When it hurts, Can you fix it?
by Smile With Happiness
Summary: Zexion starts a new school and it changes everything after being abused at home he moves to a school with dorms and will his love for his roommate work out or will he just hurt himself trying to make it work. will be smut in later chapters self harm you know that chiz R&R Dexion SemeDemyx x UkeZexion
1. Chapter 1

Today nothing could get better I was with my boyfriend and his friends considering I have non which was one reason that I had a reason to do what I did yes I loved Demyx but I craved to pain I craved for the razor to pierce my skin with is sharp edge but I tried to stop so many times but I couldn't help it, it was a bad habit that I had collected back in middle school. "Hey Zexy is something wrong" my loving boyfriend asked.

"What no I'm just lost in thought" I replied trying not to make contact with his eyes. He looked at me with worry in his eyes and turned his head with hurt.

"Then why won't you look at me, you know I worry about you Zexion I just want you to be okay I want to make sure you not doing it again" he said. I smiled reassuringly to make him think there was nothing wrong.

"I'm fine Demy don't worry" I said and turned away after looking him in the eyes I wanted to cry so bad just burst into tears but I didn't I don't think I have any tears left in me. I get bullied for being so 'emo' according to them and on top of that everybody hates me and I'm so stupid to think anybody could love me. "Dem I'm going to go back to our dorm to get some sleep" I said to him he knew though he knew I wasn't going to sleep he knew I would cut if I went alone. He grabbed my wrist as I hissed in pain and I felt tears start to sting my face. "Demyx please let go" Demyx immediately let go as soon as the words left my mouth and then held my hand pulling me down to his lap and giving me a small kiss.

"I'm going with you" he said pecked me again. I smiled at him.

"You don't have to do that stay with your friends Dem I can take care of myself" I said smiling at him. He still wouldn't let go.

"Actually I was thinking that my friends could come over so I can keep an eye on you" he said. I pouted at him.

"I'm not a little kid I'm 17 I can take care of myself" I said but he pulled my ear towards his lips.

"I know but I know what you're going to do if I let you go alone" he said then moved me off his lap and helped me up. "Come on to my dorm" he said and held my hand as if I were going to run off. Just like a small dog on a leash. The truth was I was small and frail I had thin arms and skinny legs I had cuts all over my hips, thighs, stomach, and arms I also had some on my shoulder I just put them anywhere people couldn't see that's why me and Demyx haven't been very you know active because I just always tell him I'm not in the mood or that I'm tired the truth is most the time I am in the mood I'm just too scared on what he'll say when he sees I was cutting again.

We got to our dorm and I went up to Demyx right now I wasn't in the mood to have people over so I whispered in Demyx's ear "but Demy right now I'm in a mood to play" I said with a pout. He leaned down and kissed me because I was obviously shorter.

He leaned down and whispered "I love you but when they leave we can" I nodded in a bit of sadness hell we hadn't done it in two weeks I was needy but then again I was using it as an excuse to get everyone to leave but my plan back fired they have to stay and now I have to deal with Demyx on top of it.

Okay so finally everyone left and Demyx had me pinned to the bed I think be already figured out that I cut again so I think he just ignored it. "Demy ah" I quietly moaned as Demyx slid his hand across the base of my member. He smiled at me and leaned down and bit my nipple. I moaned out in pleasure with a touch of pain. He stopped the work with kiss hand and went to nibble on my outer shell of my ear as one hand played with my nipples and the other roamed my body I groaned when I felt his hand run over my cut. "Demyx please don't touch me right there" I groaned to him but his hand moved down lower and I kept quiet until his hand moved onto a cut that was too deep for me to ignore "Demyx!" I hissed and pushed him off me as tears fell from my eyes. "Demyx why'd you keep doing that" I said as tears filled my eyes my hips were now in a lot of pain and I wanted to cry even harder. Demyx grabbed me into a hug "I'm sorry Zex I didn't mean to hurt you" he said "why?"

"Why what"? I asked curiously. The truth was I knew the why I just played dumb he wanted to know why I cut again well you know why well I don't know.

"Why did you cut again Zexion" he said "this is my god damn fault isn't it you were so close to stopping you were clean for six months or have you been lying about that too". I could tell he was angry with me I mean we went through all that and I did it again I cut and he was pissed.

"I just started again the bullying got bad again and I couldn't help it I'm sorry Dem-" that's all I could say before he cut me off.

"No enough of the lying enough of the bullshit" he yelled at me I was already crying and I just wanted it to stop I just wanted to die right now I can't stand when Demyx yells at me I really can't take it. "Well I'm going out for the night with Luxord I'm having Axel watch you so you don't try to cut or kill yourself" he said then left then just as he said Axel came in. I sat on the bed and waited for Axel to get situated and Axel sat Demyx's bed. Okay so sense Demyx is gone I will tell you the story of what happened and how Demyx and Imet.


	2. the beginning

Start day

**So in this story how I'm going to do it is I'm going to have it so Zexion is telling the story about when he first came to the high school even though it started with the present you get it so from here on out the story is in the past. So Let's Begin!**

I was joining a new school maybe this will be better than my old school maybe people will actually except me. Okay so at the moment where we are in my story I'm 15 and stupid obviously I mean I just started high school a year ago my grades started dropping just like any normal child would if they were going through what I was going through. My mom died 2 years ago when I was 13 in the eighth grade my step dad abused and raped me that's when I decided I'd start going here and I would have a dorm so I wouldn't have to deal with him the thing was I couldn't undo what he did I couldn't un see I couldn't forget what he did I just couldn't. I couldn't forget the pain I was put through my mom was too afraid to divorce him so she didn't she just continued to be with him so the torment never stopped and on top of that I was bullied so not the best thing to happen in the world but I still tried to look on the Brightside of things and then my mom died then I figured out there was no Brightside there was no one who cared about me so I resorted to cutting. After that then people decided they care about me sorry doesn't work that way you don't care about me from the beginning don't care about me when I die. Also I'm atheist so people don't like that ether oh and don't forget the fact I'm gay. See the more people change in the world the old ones are forgotten.

I walked into the dorm building and looked for my room it was room 119 I found the room and opened the door with the key I had and walked in and sat down on the bed that was occupied. I looked at the blonde sitting staring at me I looked away. Okay he was kind of cute he was blonde with a kind of half mullet half Mohawk going on he was taller than me but I was pretty short I mean I was 5'4 and he was like what 6 foot. Okay he was kind of like just my type. "Hi are you my new roommate?" he asked in a gentle voice.

"Oh yeah" I muttered with my soft voice. He looked at me and said something I wasn't really listening to I think he asked am I okay. "Yeah sure" I said and turned back to my stuff.

"Then it's a date" he said. 'Wait what' I questioned in my mind he just asked me out who would want to ask me of all people.

"Wait but I don't even know your name" I said and looked him in his big ocean blue eyes "I'm Zexion" I blushed at the thought of going on a date. I hadn't been on a date sense well before my life was fucked up.

"What a cute name I'm going to call you Zexy" he said. Oh god this might be annoying as long as he doesn't find out about the habits then we shouldn't have a problem that's all I was thinking was about how much he'll hate me when he finds out about the cutting he'll be like everyone else. "Once you get settled I'll take you around then we can get something to eat or something like that" he said to me I looked at him in the eyes and smiled maybe this won't be so bad after all.

So it turns out he didn't actually ask me out he offered to show me around then buy me lunch. I was perfectly fine with that despite the fact that I'm anorexic but I'll eat just for him even though I hardly know the guy I just don't want him to find about out my bad habits. We were at lunch we went to Starbucks I had a muffin and an iced coffee I wasn't going to complain he bought me lunch. I love how sweet he is. Once we got back to the apartment he smiled at me. "What you were holding earlier was it a sketch book" he asked I didn't know whether or not to tell him yes or no the answer was yes but I didn't know what to say because he would of asked why I draw or want to see my art.

"Yeah ever sense my mom died she always loved drawing so I took on the hobby it just always would remind me of her" I said and smiled I loved my mom I really did. Oh and I forgot to mention I have a brother by the name of Riku but I don't see him too much but he does go to this school so he's older than me he was smart and left before I did but my stepfather liked Riku so he never hurt him like he hurt me. "My brother goes here do you know him his name's Riku." I asked him and picked up my sketch book up.

"Oh Riku yeah he's in dorm 203 down the hall to the right" he said "if you'd like to see him".

"Yes thanks" I said and smiled at him "I just haven't seen him in two years" I bolted out the door to the room and I knocked. I heard someone turn the handle and there he was standing at the door it was Riku.

**Okay till next chapter** **you'll have to wait to find out what happens and what Riku does when he sees Zexy there.**


	3. For a start

_**Hey people if you didn't read my other Fanfiction for Zemyx day I talked about my YouTube channel Sir Fluffy Ears and her Minion. Please check it out I'll be doing a cosplay video called The Axel Show I'll be Axel and I will probably have a Roxas with me in it so please check out my videos right now I have a makeup tutorial on a Kanda cosplay and a game of marry, fuck, kill. So enjoy chapter 3 **_

I stared into Riku's eyes he looked as if he was starring into my soul. "Riku"! I yelled "I missed you, but you left me."

"I'm so sorry Zexion really I just needed to get out of there" he replied to my disappointment. Another teen walked up to the door.

"Who's this Riku" the redhead asked. The teen had bright red hair spiked back on his head piercing green cat like eyes that could see right through you.

"This is my brother Zexion" Riku replied "Zexion this is Axel my roommate." Riku seemed fond of the redhead I just smiled and nodded.

"Well I'm out to see Roxas" Axel said and left the room "I don't want to ruin the family reunion." Axel was soon gone and I was left alone with Riku.

"Want to go for a walk?" I asked Riku and he just nodded. We walked through the halls of the dormitory. Riku got a new boyfriend named Sora. "Riku my new roommate is really cute" I said "he told me where your room was."

"What's his name?" Riku asked.

"Demyx" I replied and just as the name came out of my mouth Riku burst into laughter. "What's so funny?" I asked annoyed.

"Just Demyx is so social and active and stuff and you're just kind of anti-social and a book worm" Riku replied.

"Opposites attract" I said smiling at him "well I'm going to get back to my room good-bye Riku." With that I left for my dorm. I made it back and Demyx wasn't there. I sat down on the edge of my bed and pulled out my sketch book and started on a new drawing I drew until Demyx got back and he had come up behind me and looked down at the drawing.

"Zexion that's a really nice drawing of me" he said. Looking at the drawing I looked back at the drawing and blushed holding it to my chest. 'Had I really just drew him by accident' I thought to myself and he saw it I blushed an even darker shade of red.

"Thanks I didn't mean to draw you it just happened." I muttered trying to hide my embarrassment. "I'm sorry I should go" I said and went to make my way to the door when he grabbed my arm. God he probably thinks I'm some weirdo. I felt like I wanted to cry yeah I start crying a lot whenever I get reminded of my step father.

"Stop Zexion it's perfectly fine to draw me I don't think your weird I think you talented" he said and looked me in the eyes with his ocean green ones.

"Demyx you wouldn't think that if you saw my other drawing" I muttered looking away.

"I bet you I would" he said I muttered fine and handed him the sketch book I was so focused on proving him wrong that I forgot that I had drawing of my stepfather abusing me and some of the papers had blood stains on them. He opened to the first page and scanned over it and turned the next then the next he was so close to the bad ones I felt so nervous that I snatched it away holding to my chest again.

"Zexion those were amazing I don't know why you underestimate yourself" he said and grabbed Zexion's hand "I know you barely know me but let me tell you, you can tell me everything and I'll sit I'll listen I'll understand Zexion I'm here and I will always try to be." He said those words changed my mind about him completely but I still felt I couldn't trust him not yet.

_**I know short chapter I haven't updated in forever and I just wanted to get a chapter done please forgive me for procrastinating R&R! Bye-Bye**_


	4. when I ran

**Hey guys its chapter 4! There is a little of Axel x Zexion okay I'm lying there's a lot of it in this chapter maybe even a smut scene.**

"You don't understand how it is for me Demyx if you knew you would hate me too" I said and looked away trying my best to not make eye contact.

"What are you talking about Zexion?" he said and grabbed my arm as I tried to run out I felt a sting and gasped in pain.

"Demyx let go of me!" I screamed trying to yank my arm away but only causing me more pain I felt a sharp pain particularly in a curtain part of my arm I saw red start to seep through my white jacket. Demyx had opened one if my cuts he looked down in shock and loosened his grip so after that I ran. I ran through the halls to find somewhere to hide I ran into the redhead from earlier I gave up I fell onto the floor and started to cry the blood staining my white jacket.

"Zexion come here what happened" he asked.

"Even if I told you, you wouldn't care" I said looking down at my arm. I guess axel noticed the part on my arm that was bleeding.

"Zexion you don't have to be scared" he said showing me the burn scars on his arms.

"A-axel y-you burned yourself" I said between sobs.

"I know your hurt come on let me patch you up" he said picking me up. I just starred at Axel not protesting as he carried me to his dorm Riku was out with Sora so it was just us.

"Axel why are you being so nice to me and not calling me a freak" I said I looked away trying to calm down.

"Because I know how you feel you feel betrayed, hurt, and alone I've been there I know how you feel that's why I showed you my scars to show you so you know that you're not alone because I've been there" Axel said finally finishing my bandages once he was done I hugged him and muttered thank you. "No problem Zex" he said and hugged back. I wanted to kiss him but I held back he probably wasn't even gay I don't care I'm going for it. I pulled away from our hug and leaned forward and pressed our lips together I didn't feel a response so I started to pull away he grabbed my shirt and slammed our lips back together. I felt his tongue lick my bottom lip asking for entrance I let him in a hand went up my shirt.

"Wait Axel this is wrong" I said and looked up at him he pulled me onto his lap and connected our lips together I felt his hard on against my leg. "Mhh Axel your hard" I said pulling away.

"Zexion so are you" he said and leaned down to my neck to bite it I moan in pleasure when he nibbled and sucked the skin.

"Axel this feels wrong." I said "What if Riku comes back."

"He won't he's with Sora" with that we continued (I'm so sorry I got your hopes up for a smut I'm just tired its 3 in the morning right now)

Afterwards

"Axel do you mind me staying here I don't want to go back to my dorm tonight?" I asked.

"It's no problem" he said. I smiled and snuggled into his chest falling into a deep sleep.

It was later that night I had woken up screaming until Axel came and comforted me. "Axel I'm scared he'll come back and hurt me" I said and looked up into Axel's emerald eyes.

"Who Zexion?" he said starring back into my pale eyes.

"My stepfather he raped me, but for some reason I feel safe in your arms you won't let him hurt me will you Axel?" I looked at him with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah I'll protect you don't worry I won't let him hurt you Zex I really like you" he said to me.

"I like you too" I said leaning up to kiss him and he met me half way. Okay now you probably wondering why is he with Axel it adds up to how I ended up with Demyx you'll see.

"Zexion you know you can tell me anything okay." He said I nodded and hugged him.

"I don't know but I feel like I already know you I feel like I can trust you" I said and gave him another peck. I snuggled back into his chest trying to sleep but scared I would just have another nightmare about my stepfather. He planted a kiss on the top of my head I snuggled with him until I got tired out and fell asleep. I muttered a thank you before I blacked out. I had finally woken up but I was alone.

"Axel!" I yelled but didn't get a response so I started to cry. He left just like everyone else. I cried and cried on his bed curling into a ball then I heard yelling from the other room I got up and walked in tears still running down my face. I nudged my head past the door. "A-axel" I muttered.

"Zexion your awake" sorry I wasn't there your brother was yelling at me" he said I nodded and walked to his side as he wrapped his arm around me.

"You're just going after my brother because Roxas dumped you" Riku yelled.

"The hell why would I do that" Axel replied.

"Riku shut up! Sense when have you ever cared about my well being you left me with Saix alone you know how many times I got raped!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and hid my face in Axel's chest "Axel can we please leave I don't want to be here right now."

"Yeah come on" he said and grabbed my hand he leaned down to whisper something in my ear "You can wear my jacket yours has blood on it" I nodded. He handed me an Avenged Sevenfold hoodie I gladly took it and slid it over my thin arms it was majorly bigger than me but it was comfy it smelled like he did cigarettes, and cinnamon. I smiled and looked up at him.

"Thank you but why are you so kind to me" I asked looking up I was trying my best not to be rude but I was curious.

"I guess because I went through the same thing I just didn't want you to get treated like I did." He said and smiled I smiled back. "You're cute when you smile you should smile more often." He said.

"I would but at the moment you're the only reason I want to smile." I said and hugged him his arm was still around me. I heard two kids talking about me and Riku so I listened in.

"What is that guy doing with my Axel" the blonde said.

"That's my boyfriend's brother, and technically you dumped Axel so you know it's kind of your fault." The burnet said.

"Shut up Sora he's mine and always will be." The other said. Me being the ass I was taught to be I turned to Axel and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Axel can I have a kiss" I asked half begging he leaned down and laid a kiss on my lips. "I really like you Axel." I said just load enough for the blonde to hear.

"I like you too Zexion." He replied leaning down for another kiss but was interrupted by the blonde.

"Axel! What are you doing!" he yelled I looked up innocently at Axel.

"Axie-senpai what's wrong who is this" I asked.

"He's my Ex. Roxas meet Zexion." He said "Zexion is my current boyfriend" I just blushed at the title."

"What the hell Axel how can you just go and date someone else!" he yelled.

"What do you care you dumped me not the other way around!" Axel yelled back.

"Axel you're scaring me please don't yell" I said squeezing his hand.

"Oh that's pathetic he's even wearing you jacket" he leaned close to my face "don't touch my Axel or else I'll make you wish you were never born." I had it within seconds my fist collided with his face I was shaking and tears were strolling down my face.

"Don't fucking threaten me!" I yelled and ran off.

"Look what you did" was the last thing I heard Axel said. He started chasing me down the hall when he found me he pulled me into a kiss which turned into a make out session "Don't run off like that I was scared that something was going to happen I care about you Zexion."

"Axel this is so wrong" I started "I got mad at Demyx he made my arm bleed and by not facing him I ran into you and apparently now we're dating Ax it's all so confusing." I whimpered and he hugged me.

"Zexion I really want to be with you" he said.

"But, why so suddenly you just met me is it because I feel the pain you went through, or are you lying to me. You're trying to mess with me aren't you you're just trying to hurt me aren't you!" I yelled he grabbed me and hugged me before I could run off.

"Zexion I would never do that when I said I liked you I was serious." He replied "I really like you Zexion believe me I'm sorry if I came off too strong but Zexion I really like you I want to be with you."

"But, you don't know anything about me." I said looking him in the eyes.

"Riku would talk about you all the time he made you seem like such an amazing person, I don't know if that's true but I want to learn more about this amazing person." He said and placed a kiss on my forehead. He picked me up again like yesterday I just stayed calm and let him carry me back to my dorm. We had finally got to my dorm and he set me down on my bed and went to leave. But I grabbed his shirt.

"Axel don't leave" I said "if you leave I don't know if I can stop myself seeing you face gives me self-control" I said 'barely though' I thought to myself.

"Alright I'll stay but I have to leave later." He finished lying down next to me. "But once you're asleep I have to leave. Alright babe?" he asked.

"M'kay" I said and lied down on his chest slowly falling into a deep sleep.

**Alright I made a long chapter just for you guy I know there's a lot of AkuZeku but it's part of the story you'll just have to see where it goes.**


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